求一篇简单又搞笑的英语小短文来作课前报告!

求一篇简单又搞笑的英语小短文来作课前报告!
求一篇简单又搞笑的英语小短文来作课前报告!

求一篇简单又搞笑的英语小短文来作课前报告!
A woman was having some trouble with her heart,so she went to see the doctor.He was a new doctor,and did not know her,so he first asked some questions,and one of them was,“How old are you?”
“Well,” she answered,“I don’t remember,doctor,but I will try to think,” she thought for a minute and then said,“yes,I remember now,doctor!When I married,I was eighteen years old,and my husband was thirty.Now my husband is sixty,I know.And that is twice thirty.So I am twice.That is thirty-six,isn’t it?”
One evening,a few days before John’s seventh birthday,he was saying his prayers in his bedroom before he went to bed.“Please,God,” he shouted,“make them give me a big box of chocolate for my birthday on Saturday.”
His mother was in the kitchen,but she heard the small boy shouting and went into his bedroom quickly.
“Why are you shouting,John?” she asked her son.“God can hear you when you talk quietly.”
“I know,” answered the clever boy with a smile,“but Grandfather’s in the next room,and he can’t.”
One day Mrs.Jones went shopping.When her husband came home in the evening,she began to tell him about a beautiful dress.“I saw it in a shop this morning,” she said,“and ……”
“And you want to buy it,” said her husband.“How much does it cost?”
“40 dollars.”
“40 dollars for a dress?That is too much!”
But every evening,when Mr.Jones came back from work,his wife continued to speak only about the dress,and at last,after a week,he said,“Oh,buy the dress!Here is the money!” She was very happy.
But the next evening,when Mr.Jones came home and asked,“Have you got the famous dress?” she said,“No.”
“Why not?” he said.
“Well,it was still in the window of the shop after a week,so I thought,nobody else wants this dress,so I don’t want it either.”